Should we really put Carrie & Co. on a pedestal?

It’s been 9 years (3 if you count the movies) since we said goodbye to the racy show about four New York women struggling with their sex lives and we’re still talking about it. There’s even a spin-off series based on young Carrie. THAT is success. Sex And The City was one of the first TV shows that dared to bring the S word to your screen. It’s really one of the top things you remember about the 90s.

I remember I didn’t get the chance to watch it until it was over for good and I was in high school because my parents wouldn’t let me. To quote my dad, SATC is about “how 40-year-old women get laid”. Fortunately, the greek network that broadcast SATC never really stopped airing reruns (same with Friends – it’s been on Greek TV nonstop from the moment it aired the pilot episode!) so it’s safe to say that I’ve watched each episode at least five times.

The amazing thing about SATC is that it never goes out of style. No matter how many years will pass, women will still be out there trying to find Mr. Right. Were the storylines a bit OTT? Hell yeah! I mean, nothing wrong with having multiple sexual partners and trying out new things in the bedroom but no woman who wants to be respected at her workplace will go down on her boss in his office, even if her boss is also her boyfriend (yes, I’m looking at you, Samantha). Our feisty blonde may be good at her job (she made Smith a freaking star) but how does she manage to still have it when she constantly mixes work with pleasure?

Whenever I talked with my girlfriends about the show, we all agreed that Samantha was the most “honest” one in the crew, despite her promiscuous attitude. She may have slept with half the city but at least she never presented herself as something else. She has always been open about her sexuality. Carrie on the other hand is a whole different story.

I’ve come across women that worshiped Carrie and women that wanted to bitchslap her everytime she showed her pretty curls on screen. I belong to the latter group. How can you love Carrie when all she was was a bad girlfriend and a bad friend? Seriously. Everyone went on and on about how she and Big were perfect for each other. And they were because he was also a bad boyfriend. Really, they deserved each other. Remember how Carrie cheated on Aidan? Aidan, the most perfect boyfriend ANY woman could EVER find? Remember how Big was married to Natasha for the entire time the affair lasted? How Natasha broke her tooth while running after she caught Carrie with her husband in her house and how Carrie stalked her for days and demanded that she forgive her? I could go on for ages, and you know what, I will. Remember how Aidan took back the woman that cheated on him only to be dumped again? Or how Carrie invited Big to Aidan’s house and actually wanted Aidan to be nice to him? How can you look up to a woman that behaves this way in her relationships? And don’t tell me that Carrie fought hard for her relationship with Big to work. Yes, he treated her badly and she knew it. Yes, she loved him. But why stay in such a toxic relationship when you’re the only one that tries? Everytime they got back together, she knew exactly what she was getting herself into. And about the Carrie being a bad friend comment I made earlier, yes, Carrie was a bad friend. She did stand by her friends in their difficult times but she was also unsupportive when their decisions contradicted her plans. When Charlotte didn’t want to give her engagement ring to Carrie so that she could get a loan to pay for rent, she put the blame on the sane woman that judged her friend for buying expensive shoes over saving up for rent. I mean, really?? Miranda decided to move to Brooklyn because it was best for her family but Carrie was like “You can’t move to Brooklyn! Stay here in a lousy appartment because we’ll have cosmos every night.”. Honestly, Miranda got the worst of it. She never liked Big and with good reason and everytime she tried to open her friend’s eyes, she became the bad guy.

I’m not saying that this show contains bad role models. It’s just a TV show meant for fun. It pains me watching real women (my age or younger) out there thinking they’re Carrie or Samantha and acting like they’re all so fabulous. Again, I won’t judge anyone for liking sex too much (who doesn’t?) but I will judge you if you think that cheating on your boyfriend and breaking up marriages make you “so Carrie”. Why not try to be “so you” for a change?


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